Archive for depression

“From sedentary to marathon runner and over 200 pounds lost”

By: Liz Derry

Looking at me today, people are shocked when they hear that I have lost and maintained over 200 pounds of weight loss, eliminated multiple health problems, including diabetes, and went from sedentary to marathon runner, all through healthy eating and exercise, without pills, surgeries, shots, weighing and measuring foods, or counting calories. The affects of my change to a whole food plant based diet were not just physical, but emotional, mental, and spiritual.

At the start of 2020, at the age of 44, I weighed almost 400 pounds and was suffering from many health problems including chronic reflux, poor wound healing, type 2 diabetes, arthritis, depression, poor sleep, chronic fatigue, high blood pressure, menstrual problems, and general despondency. I had lost and gained large amounts of weight multiple times in my life, including over 100 pounds 2 other times. I had been on many different diets and none of them were working for me anymore. I was only able to lose 30-40 pounds and then would quickly gain it all back. After a recent family vacation in which I spent most of the time sitting on benches, while my family explored the sites, I had reached an all-time low. I felt so old and run down physically and wondered what type of life I had left, unable to enjoy time and activities with my children, and eventually grandchildren, and likely facing an early death.

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“I dove into a study on the Word of Wisdom like I never had before”

By: Janeen Burke

My name is Janeen Burke. I’m 42 and a stay-at-home mom of four. We recently moved to Provo from Grass Valley, California because my husband got a job teaching at BYU.

My journey has been long, so I’ll try to keep this as short as possible. I gained a fascination for nutrition and health during a nutrition class in high school. I became fascinated about how what we eat determines so much of our health and how certain foods did certain things. Growing up in the Church, I always knew about the Word of Wisdom, but it hasn’t been until about the last four years that I’ve realized what it’s really saying and how important it is to follow it. I know now that it is truly all we need for health, but coming to know that has been a long and slow process.

When my oldest son (now 20) was four years old, he was diagnosed with “high functioning autism.”  I quickly dove into researching treatments that were natural as I didn’t want to medicate him. Coming to that personal revelation is a whole other story, but completely intertwined with this journey and story. In my research, it became clear that my son was an excellent candidate to try the GFCF (gluten free/dairy free) diet due to digestion issues he chronically had. My husband and I noticed immediate improvement in his behaviors, so we were confident we were on the right course. There began to be other things and other diets that we tried as we were going through ups and downs and with each diet, we saw different improvements and I learned different things.  Sometimes progression, sometimes regression, but I never gave up on researching, trying new things all the while seeking guidance from God. Time went by and I had twins, they each had their own issues that were helped with the knowledge I gained.

Then I had my fourth child, and it was a very traumatic emergency c-section to save my son’s life. My recovery was horrible, and I had pains that weren’t going away. I was using the knowledge of nutrition and essential oils that I had gained over the years and there was some improvement. But, I was still dealing with pain that wouldn’t go away. A chiropractor recommended a Paleo diet and I gave it a try. I was on it for a few months and noticed that there was improvement, but new problems started rising. I had horrible ringing in my ears that kept me up at night, heart palpitations and dizziness and then about two years later and worst of all . . . I started having depression and anxiety. I even started having suicidal thoughts out of nowhere and for no good reason because my life was good! I knew it had to be something physical/medical affecting my mental health.  I did not want to be on medication.  I knew there had to be an answer through nutrition, so I prayed earnestly to find it.  Then when my youngest son was also diagnosed with autism at age two, my prayers became even more frequent and passionate in finding an answer for both of us.

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“I enjoy my food now more than I ever have before!”

By: Jason Jenkins

As an 11lb 7oz baby, I enjoyed robust health and had a Bruce Lee physique until I was 10 years old. The demise of “Bruce Lee” was precipitated by a family curse, of sorts––an invitation to stay at my cousin’s house. It was two weeks of pure, unadulterated gluttony. I had access to all the “good” stuff I never got at home. There was a bottomless cooler stocked with soda, a bounty of Twinkies, Ho Ho’s, Ding Dongs, and even little cheese-stuffed wieners. I was in hog heaven. By the time I got home I was wearing an extra ten pounds of blubber. That extra weight stuck with me for the rest of my school years.

I served a mission in Colorado in ‘92 & ‘93 and was well fed by the loving members there. One fast Sunday, my companion and I had dinner with a family that egged us on, encouraging us to eat seconds, thirds, fourths–––then dessert! Gluttony once again reared its frightful mien, and I ate far too much. When it was time to go, I realized that, quite literally, I could not sit down on my bicycle. I was so stuffed, I could not bend over. I had to ride back to our apartment standing up. I was so uncomfortable that the rest of the day was a complete loss.

In 1999, at the age of 64, my dad suffered a heart attack and had a 5-way heart bypass. The doctor told him he would have another ten years. Watching him go through that sternum-splitting surgery––and painful recovery––I knew I wanted to avoid the same fate, if at all possible. I thought that if I could just exercise enough, I could stay in good shape, inside and out. My dad lived another 20 years, before suffering a major plaque eruption that he did not survive.

When I got married in 2001, I was still searching for the secret to becoming “addicted” to exercise so I could avoid gaining the “newlywed 30”––A fate that had befallen many fit and trim friends. As the years went by and our family grew, my time and energy seemed to shrink, while my waistline expanded, and it became harder and harder to maintain good health.

In 2011, my wife’s aunt suffered a heart attack. I felt at that time that I needed to go vegetarian. It was something that I had been thinking about and it just seemed to be the right time. My hope was to be a good example for her and to follow my own impressions of a healthier path. I ate a vegetarian diet for several years, but gradually lost motivation and started eating meat again.

In 2016 I found myself really struggling. With everything. I was serving as a bishop, working a full-time job, plus a side job, with a wife and five kids, ages 1-10. I even tried to go back to school during this time, but my energy, focus, and productivity hit rock bottom. Brain fog, fatigue, anxiety and overwhelm were daily companions. I was overweight, depressed, and worried about being able to keep my job.

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“My depression and anxiety slowly cleared up”

By: Elise Dunlap

I grew up in a household divided by food. One parent was more focused on healthy eating than the other, and it was always a subject of contention in our household. Like most Americans, I have a family history of cancer, autoimmune diseases, strokes, heart attacks, diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. Growing up, everyone I knew considered our family to be healthy. Fruit and egg burritos for breakfast, salad with our “real” dinner every night, but donuts and pizza on the weekend. You know, “balanced.”

The first time my health took a dive was when I was in high school (around 2013). I started dealing with lots of tension, especially in my shoulders and neck, sometimes to the point of tears if they were even lightly touched, so I started seeing a chiropractor, which seemed to help quite a bit. I also started experiencing fatigue and intense depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. After an intense episode of depression where I laid in bed all day and skipped school without telling anyone, I went to see a therapist and got put on some typical antidepressants (Wellbutrin and Prozac). I didn’t feel like myself at all. The medications seemed to suppress my emotions and make things feel really one-note, but it was enough of an improvement that I wasn’t feeling as suicidal as I had been.

Feeling overwhelmed by school, I dropped out of two of my three Advanced Placement (AP) courses. At this time, I was exercising pretty intensely. I would wake up and do P90x with my parents in the morning, and I had swim practice after school. I was very fit. Despite the brightness of my future everyone was always telling me about, I always dreamed of something better than how I was experiencing my day-to-day reality.

After graduating, I left for college at Southern Virginia University. Living in a dorm, I was required to have a meal plan. I’ve always been a big eater and a binge eater if there’s desserts within a ten-mile radius, and the college buffet was now all mine for the taking. I ate plenty of fruits and vegetables, but I also indulged in all kinds of sweet treats and fried foods, including the ice cream bar after every lunch and dinner. I would gorge on three breakfast scones and smuggle three more of them out of the cafeteria for later.

At college, I was taking a karate class and still managed to stay “fit” with that two-hour class each week. However, my coursework was suffering, and my mental health was plunging again. I was “that roommate who was always asleep.” I would sleep ten hours at night and take a five-hour nap during the day. My depression and anxiety continued to worsen.

Realizing that I had no money, I started to rent out my bishop’s basement the next spring and got a job at a Wendy’s just out of town. I sat in on some courses, but I wasn’t getting credit anymore because I had debts with the school that I had to pay off first. I ate lots of Frosties, chicken sandwiches and burgers because of where I was working, and unknown to me, I started to gain weight. I also started having terrible seasonal allergies which were worse than I thought could exist. My depression and anxiety became crippling. I had a panic attack at work one morning after dealing with a rude customer. I soon realized that I needed to go back home. I was sick, depressed, and out of money.

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“I’ve battled depression most of my adult life and been suicidal on multiple occasions”

By: DaNae Dayley

It’s been just over a year since I started eating a whole food, plant based diet. I wanted to wait until I had spectacular before and after photos to share my story, but the main theme of my story isn’t about weight loss, that’s just been part of the journey. I feel like what I have to share is important enough that it needs to be told. Right now.

Depression is not the absence of happiness. I would describe myself as an optimistic, fun-loving, happy person—with Major Depressive Disorder. Having MDD is like wearing an invisible backpack full of heavy rocks all the time. No matter how much you want to do something, those rocks will make it a whole lot harder, and some days, they make it literally impossible. I still get emotional just reminiscing about it. For me, being suicidal was when those rocks were so heavy that I didn’t even have the energy to breathe.

In many ways, my life has been ideal. I have lots of people who love me, a beautiful home, plenty to eat, and many friends. My circumstances had nothing to do with my depression. I didn’t understand this for way too long. I have battled depression most of my adult life, and I’ve been suicidal on multiple occasions.

In my 30s and most of my 40s, I was exhausted and in pain most of the time and there was nothing medically wrong with me. Doctors weren’t helpful because all my tests came back normal. We were all mystified.

Up to that point, I felt like my diet was pretty healthy most of the time, and I was very active. I loved to be outside and exercise was a high priority for me. A list of my favorite things to do included hiking, camping, jeeping, and karate.

But the more tired I felt, the less healthy our meals became and the more weight I gained. I was devastated that my kids would have memories of me as an overweight, practically bed-ridden mother that never had the energy to do fun things with them. During this time, I actually remember looking at the Word of Wisdom and wondering why I couldn’t “run and not be weary” and “walk and not faint.” (D&C 89:20) It never occurred to me that I needed to cut down my meat consumption or even eat more fruits and vegetables. When I had the energy, I felt like I was making very healthy choices. Small servings of lean meat, veggies, and whole grains. The problem was that the worse I felt the more that turned into take-out or frozen prepared meals, and the less I even cared.

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“I love the way I feel. I love my way of life!”

Helen Jessup Before and After

By: Margie Burton for her sister, Helen Jessup

My sister Helen was born nearly 72 years ago. Mom had a challenging pregnancy after months of infertility treatments. The premature delivery was a difficult one requiring forceps that damaged both frontal lobes of Helen’s brain. Her infant and toddler milestones showed slight delays but all seemed to be progressing reasonably well until a sudden seizure at the age of three. She had been riding her tricycle in the driveway when she slumped over and fell to the ground, not breathing. Mom, an obstetrical nurse, ran out and immediately began CPR while driving her to the nearest hospital. Helen was revived, but being without oxygen for some time caused more brain damage. She was never able to ride her tricycle again.

Helen went to regular public schools for kindergarten and elementary school. She had difficulty and repeated a grade when she did not develop number sense and could not read well. When Helen was ten and starting 4th grade, the teacher declared that she could not have her in class as she was too far behind in her learning. In those days, school districts did not have accommodations for disabled learners. My parents were dismayed as the options in our little New Hampshire town were limited. They finally found a boarding school in Massachusetts that catered to students with limited academic abilities. It was expensive, but my parents could not find an alternative willing to accept her.

Helen had been quite sheltered in her 10 years of life, and she felt abandoned by her family at the boarding school. She did not understand what she had done to be sent away from her loved ones. She slowly progressed in her academics but emotionally life was very difficult for her.

During Helen’s teenage years she began to put on quite a bit of weight. My mom seemed to look the other way, declaring that Helen enjoyed few pleasures besides food. At the age of 20 she graduated from her school program with a certificate of completion and came home to live. My parents tried to find places for her to go and things for her to do, but she continued to find comfort in food.

Our dad passed away quite suddenly in 1973 at the age of 62. Helen was devastated. He had been her comforter and her strength. When our mom died 25 years later, Helen became my responsibility. By then, her eating pleasures had taken a big toll on her health. She had type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure. She also suffered from emotional instability and severe depression. She went through various testing to see what public services were available. She could talk like an 8 year old but problem-solved at a two-year old level. That would never change.

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“I am not after mediocre results with my health or life. I want outstanding results!”

By: Janeen Alley

For as long as I can remember I’ve loved health and the human body and was fascinated with how it worked. I also knew that in my life journey I really wanted to help people. Fortunately, I found plant-based nutrition early on, but it wasn’t until after a few unhealthy detours. Currently, I’m a health and life coach and run my own business. I’m passionate about educating others about the newfound energy and life I discovered after I stumbled upon plant-based nutrition in 2004.

After I graduated from college, I got a job working as a personal trainer in a gym in 2001. I had taught anatomy as a teaching assistant at BYU for 2 years, so it was an easy position to transition into.

The job proved to be more challenging than I thought. As a trainer, I couldn’t give specific nutrition advice to my clients because it was beyond my scope of training. I could ask if they were eating “a balanced diet” – if they said yes, I could move on to their workouts. If they said “no” – I could point them to the My Plate guidelines, and then… move on to their workouts!

I knew diet mattered, but at the time, I didn’t realize how much. When my clients failed to reach their goals, I was devastated for them. I was also frustrated and embarrassed I couldn’t figure out how to troubleshoot better and get them the results they were after.

At the time, I thought I had a “pretty good diet.” My dad was a physician and my mom made everything from scratch. They lived by the Moderation Mantra: everything is okay, even healthy, as long as it is consumed in moderation. I have found that this thought and lifestyle only creates mediocre results. I don’t know about you, but I am not after mediocre results with my health or life. I want outstanding results!

I knew how the body worked – down to the nitty gritty details – but I couldn’t figure out how to get outstanding results for my clients. According to my training manual, I was doing everything right. But I was still confused by ALL the conflicting information out there on nutrition, and I definitely didn’t feel good about recommending gym supplements because I knew there were some dangerous side effects.

When my husband started dental school in Philadelphia in 2002, I was more than relieved to get away from my frustrations at the gym and move on to the next phase of my life. Our first two children were born while we lived there (2002 and 2004). But not only had I stopped training clients, I stopped taking care of myself. As a result, my energy levels tanked, I put on weight, struggled with my acne, and lost a TON of hair during my pregnancies.

I remember being exhausted! When my son was about 9 months old, I have memories of being so tired I couldn’t get up off the floor. I would lay down and try to stay awake while he would crawl on my legs and back to try to get me up to play with him. I felt like a horrible mom. I didn’t want to take him to the park or to the library because I didn’t have the energy. I knew I needed to do something different.

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“I love eating this way. It makes life so simple.”

Perpetue RobertBy: Perpetue Robert Pardieu

All my life my legs and feet have felt really heavy, sometimes swollen, but I never knew why. I remember ten years ago I was praying and asking the Lord for help and He sent me to D&C 89. At that time I learned that meat was to be eaten sparingly, during winter and famine. It was summer, and it was difficult, so I did not follow it. So, I remained with my swollen feet.

In January 2012, I was hit by a car and my kneecap, tibia and femur broke. I had three surgeries and still was having inflammation even though I was taking anti-inflammatory medication. I hit my head during the accident, and I was having panic attacks and anxiety. I felt depressed and overwhelmed often. So, I started doing research because I did not want to be taking pills and become dependent. This is how I heard about alkaline and acid food. I started researching and changed my diet by eating more alkaline, non-hybrid foods. But I got so anxious about everything I was eating that I could not sleep. So, I went to the Lord with that and felt that that kind of anxious spirit doesn’t come from him.

By researching on the Internet, I discovered Jane Birch and the Word of Wisdom diet she writes about. When I read this, I remembered that ten years earlier the Lord had sent me to D&C 89. I automatically knew that what she was saying was a confirmation of what the Lord had told me ten years ago. I stopped eating meat, dairy, eggs, sugar, and most processed food. I now eat extremely little fish and use only a tiny bit of olive or coconut oil once in awhile. Now, the spirit I feel is one of peace instead of being anxious or stressed about food.

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“The doctor was giddy about my results.”

Dave and Petra HansenBy: Dave Hansen

Having been raised in Idaho in a family that has always been very active in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I was taught about the Word of Wisdom. I was taught that the use of tobacco, drinking of alcoholic beverages as well as coffee and black tea was prohibited. I was aware that other substances were ordained for the use of man by God including fruits in their season, vegetables, and grains. I had been raised to believe that since meat was ordained for the use of man, it was also good to consume. In addition our family took pride in the dairy business that they were involved in, even though my father chose another path of employment shortly after my birth. We believed the commercials that milk “does a body good.”

After getting married and being on my own, I never allowed margarine on my dinner table, only the finest butter. Ice cream was purchased by the gallons and always readily available, as well as cheese. I reveled in some of my specialty dishes; my three egg ham and cheese omelets were a favorite of my family, as well as my pecan pie, grilled New York Steak, and my award winning chili (which was always more carne than beans). In the United States, the LDS culture is immersed in the Western diet that I was so accustomed to. Potlucks, barbeques, funerals, ice cream socials, and all other social gatherings within the Church are centered on a diet of meat and dairy.

On a Sunday morning in the spring of 2013 I woke to a nagging pressure in my chest with radiating pain in my neck and left arm, deep inside. This is a symptom that had been slowly getting worse over the previous two years. At first it was only noticeable when I was involved in extreme exercise, but it gradually showed up when I simply walked up a flight of stairs. This morning I was not doing anything, but it was there. I thought about skipping Church that day and resting, thinking that I may have just overdid it the day before on our motorcycle ride. I was reminded of a talk that I had heard at some conference in the past that if we didn’t want to do something the Lord wanted us to do, then we should really do it because there was something that we were supposed to learn from it, so I got ready for Church with my wife and we went.

During Sacrament meeting one of the speakers relayed a recent experience he had endured when he had a heart attack, so afterward I felt inspired to ask him about the symptoms. He asked me why, and I relayed to him what I was feeling. He told me to go immediately to the emergency room, and to not attend the following Sunday School or Priesthood meetings. Well I, being the stubborn soul that I am, attended Sunday School anyways; however, the pressure in my chest was not getting better, so afterward I told my wife that maybe we should go to the emergency room so they could rule out my heart as the culprit.

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“Our life will never be the same again!”

Markus and Caroline GappmaierBy: Caroline Gappmaier

I always thought we ate fairly healthy. Baking our own bread from grains I milled, eating only a little meat, and then basically no red meat, no drinking of soft drinks, etc. Of course, I did have a sweet tooth and liked cheese very much (you know, I’m Swiss, and those of you who have tasted our cheese and chocolate will understand!). Then, our family experienced an extended period of existential stress which brought me health-wise to a point where I hardly could eat anything anymore. I had suffered from severe rheumatism before, with chronic pain mainly in my shoulders, but with all the other joints suffering also (which meant never being without pain day and night). But now with this added stress, my skin had turned so yellowish that even strangers would address me about it. Around my eyes were deep, dark circles. I kept losing weight. I had random itches all over my body all the time. I started feeling as if my body could stop working at any given moment. My thighs had white marble lines on them and going to the toilet smelled like walking into some of those old folks’ rest rooms. I had to leave early for everything because hurrying was too much and got me out of breath. All the while I had no strength to deal with any kind of extra stress. I felt depressed constantly instead of being happy and easygoing, as would reflect my personality. I was always worried and feeling bad. It was miserable!

Realizing things could not go on like that much longer, I adjusted my diet. I had already let go of all refined sugar products. When I realized that cheese caused feelings of anxiety, I stopped eating that, too. Finally, I started eating only the things I digested well and made me feel physically good afterwards: fresh produce (fruit, vegetables, nuts and seeds). For one year, I ate nothing else. Fruits in the morning (usually a fruit smoothie with some flax seeds, brown millet and pure honey in it) and a mixed salad of vegetables and lettuce with some seeds and nuts in the afternoon. Today I think this saved my life. As I got better, I started to reintroduce other foods again. A few years later, as my husband, Markus, also struggled with his health, we felt we should change to a whole food, plant-based diet. Our health improved slowly, but surely. I was able to go back to a more normal life style in general again, feeling less depressed and having more physical energy and no pain. Happiness came back and in the (early!) morning I started to be fully awake again. No more lead in the bones or short breath.

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